Please note....... this blog does not serve as a pity party!! It does not look to represent all Sicklers in the world, it just my perspective on the disease and how I live my life.
Yes I said it, I am a Sickler and I wear that label with pride. Being one has defined me as a person but it is all not all of me. If you're curious, have a gander I'm sure you won't regret it :)
Been posting a lot lately and I'm sure I'm jumping on a mad marketing bandwagon but dude.......the phenomenon that is Magna Carta Holy Grail is approaching........ and it can't any sooner!!
But lets talk about the marketing....... sure genius! You mean to say before you even release the album you already have Platinum status?! Now let me put into context, the Jayz brand - going on the quality of the music alone - does NOT need to ensure success before the masses get to it. There are too many JayZ die-hards in the world, but this is not enough for Jayz. Some might think of it as cheating, I mean he has moved the goal post on this album release, but in order to get a company like Samsung to outright BUY copies of your music before release? Tooo MAD!!
Now I'm not going to buy a samsung phone anytime soon..... I'm still a die-hard iPhone chick.... but I'm itching for this album. From the piano hook, to the speakers blowing out, to 'I made you a verb....... I always wanted to be a verb' comment I can't wait. Jayz you can't let me down.......... Toddles!
I say it time and time again......... there is talent in this country. You just have to stand still and focus past the chaos that is Nigeria. In recent years we have seen an explosion of talent on the music scene.......from the pop hits from D'Banj to the eclectic sounds of Blackmagic, to the soulful croons of Bez, we are spoilt for choice.
I came across singer/songwriter Bemyoda on NdaniTV Sessions and I was blown away. Ndani TV further described Bemyoda as follows;
"Bemyoda is as much a creative writer as he is a beautiful singer. He does not present you music that is the norm; every line is the summary of a deeper meaning, every phrase explains a concept larger than it. His soulful sound has influences ranging from jazz and the blues to neo-soul and afro-pop, creating the eclectic mix that is Bemyoda.....”
Personally, I just love the 'earth' in his voice. It has a depth that just makes you want to get lost in. Yes I confess I am a shameless groupie! On the 13th of June, Bemyoda released his EP Sketch for us to enjoy. Click here to download and appreciate!! If you luv his music like I do, feel free to drop him a line on Twitter and Facebook :) Toodles!!!
Growing up, I always thought of myself as an 'fugly' child. I was a tomboy at heart in a house full of girlie girls (save my Dad of course...). In recent years I've come into my own style-wise. I absolutely love my hair and I would not have it any other way. This was an interview intended for another blog but I thought it would be fun sharing it with you. So if you have any questions feel free to leave a comment and I'll get back to you........ Toddles!
How long have you been natural?
I have been natural since 2001 and I started my locs 31st of
January 2008
Why did you decide to go natural?
I was never happy with my hair relaxed.I remember as a child I would beg my mother
for a perm because all the girls in school had it and they looked more grown
up. I remember sitting in the chair thinking that I would transform from an ugly caterpillar to a beautiful butterfly with my newly permed hair. Big Mistake!!My hair didn’t take to the relaxer and
due to my high pain threshold - as indicated in my other posts - I would always end
up with a burnt scabby scalp.
My Afro in 2001
During my undergraduate, I just got to a point where enough
was enough!!I started to braid my hair
with extensions and ‘waited’ for the relaxed hair to fall off.I absolutely loved the flexibility my natural
hair gave me in the UK.I could switch
between two-strand twists and bone straight pressed hairstyles.
My transition to natural hair was a journey of
self-discovery while my journey to locs was one of self-assuredness. I knew I wasn’t going to go back to the creamy
crack, and managing my afro was getting cumbersome, so the only option I was
willing to try was to loc my hair.It
wasn’t a drastic change; I had maintained my natural hair using two-strand
twists for about four years.Most people
at that point already assumed that I had locs, so I took the plunge.
With my parents took the ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’
approach.My mother had always supported
the move to natural hair but I think my parent’s apprehension was more towards
how the negative connotations towards locs would affect me getting a job.
My starter locks around July 2008
What do you do, and how does your hair affect
your job or vice versa?
At the time I started my locs I was in the final year of my
Ph.D. No one cared about the state of my hair because no one saw me.This was advantageous because even the best-kept
locs at the starter stage can look a little nappy, and frankly I looked like a
boy!
My corporate career started in Nigeria, so by the time I
joined the rat race my locs were fairly mature.My first Job was at a well-known Investment Bank in Nigeria.My hair wasn’t long enough to put into a bun,
so I would have my locs curled and styled to take to work.At the time I never really thought about what
impact my locs would have on people’s impression on me.
The reality of the situation is this – Employers that are
too focused on what your hair is as opposed to what value you bring with
regards to your skills are short sighted.As an employee your responsibility to ensure that you are tidy and presentable
to clients at all time, regardless if you have a weave, relaxed, braided,
natural or loc’d hair.
Curling my hair
The result, obviously I was bored at work, Aug 2010
Have you been to Nigeria since you went
natural?
Yes I have
What was your experience being natural in
Nigeria?
My initial experience in Nigeria was not a happy one, hair-wise.When I would come home on Christmas vacations,
I could never find a hairdresser that would not try to convince me to relax my
hair!They mistreated my hair and
couldn’t understand why an African woman would have natural hair for
non-religious reasons!!!
These vacation experiences contributed towards the transition
from Afro to Locs.I knew I wouldn’t be
happy with how I would have to maintain my hair in Nigeria, so I decided to loc before
I moved back home.In a lot
of ways maintaining locs is easier than maintaining an Afro.
Having locs in Nigeria has also been an interesting
experience.
Is that all your hair?
No really? What extentions did you put?
Really is that all your hair?I thought it was braids!!
How long have you had your hair like this?
Really?And you haven’t changed your hair since?
What happens when you want to do another
style?Do you have to cut it off?
What do you mean your not considering cutting your locs off anytime soon?
Above are the typical questions women typically ask me on a
day-to-day basis.I’ve even had a woman
pull on my hair because she wasn’t convinced I was telling the truth.
What are the challenges you’ve encountered
since going natural?
Maintenance has always been an issue for me.I am lazy when it comes to my hair, so I’m
always on the lookout for stylists that can help me maintain my hair.Finding stylists in Nigeria has always been
an issue.
What is your routine?
Once a month I wash, deep condition and re-loc the base of
my locs.To loc I use a shea butter and coconut oil mix.I then will sit under a
hair dryer to dry my roots and let the rest of my hair air dry.This helps retain moisture within the
hair, which helps my hair feel soft.
I would not recommend using bees wax because it is
heavy and tends to fix lint into the hair giving it a permanent grey look.Locking Gel is also a massive no-no.Locking gel tends to dry out your hair making
it brittle and hard.
In-between hair appointments I maintain my hair with shea butter whips, almond oil and tea-tree sprays for my scalp. The key is always to ‘listen’ to your
hair.Shea butter tends to be heavy so
if I do use it I use it sparingly to avoid build up.I stay way from petroleum-based products
because they build up residue in the hair and can be difficult to get out.
On occasion I do like to dye my hair (yes, I do get bored of my hair from time to time).I use semi-permanent dyes and I tend to leave
those treatments far and few between because they can dry out your hair.
Who are your natural hair Idols?
Before they chopped off their locs, my hair idols were India Aire and Lauren Hill.
I Love Love Love Love Franchesca Ramsey on YouTube (Chescalocs & Chescaleigh). She has inspired me to experiment with my hair, which has added an element of fun to my style.
Closer to home, there is Nibi - owner of the Kinky Apothecary blog. She is the expert of all things Natural Hair!!
Today (June 19th) is World Sickle Cell Awareness day created by the United Nations.......... It's days like today that make me wonder about my very existence.
There is a lot of energy being put into the awareness of sickle cell, it's prevention and its possible cure, but sadly the same effort hasn't been put into trying to understand how people live with the condition.
The concept of prevention scares me. I know it's coming from a selfish place, but let me explain. Due to my mother's rare genotype, when my parents got married they couldn't identify she carried the Beta thalassemia trait. So my parents sired me without knowing I was a sickler....... So the question is, if they had of known would I exist?
Today in Nigeria, many churches have taken up the role of not sanctioning marriages between a couple who both have the sickle cell trait. I find this very disturbing!
The decision of marriage should be between the two people to want to go on that journey. Sickle cell awareness should help the couple make a well informed decision about their journey but it should not define whether they take the challenge or not.
Don't get me wrong, it's not an ideal situation, but hell there is a 3 in 4 chance of them having a non-sickler. In addition due to advances in medicine it is possible to test early enough in the pregnancy to find out whether the child has sickle or not. There are options for those individuals that decide to take up the chance of having a sickler, but that is for another post.
Being a sickler does suck balls but dammit I exist, and I am fully functional. I have achieved a lot in my life and I'm sure my parents are proud of me and are happy they had me.
Sickle cell awareness should also be about celebrating our Sickle Cell Warriors. The ones that come out swinging, despite the odds. So today, spread the word about Sickle Cell, research it, understand it, and by all means HUG A SICKLER, they'll appreciate it.
Toddles!!
Found this video of another sickler, Prodigy from Mobb Deep (his status was made famous by 2Pac)
The first time someone asked me that question I shot back a typical Foxy reply "What's it like being normal?" I still get irritated when people make the mistake of asking that question. I mean, this has been my existence from the day one. So how exactly do you want me to quantify it for you? What do you want me to compare it to? What does sickle cell pain feel like? It’s a question that most people ask and it’s not an easy question to answer. Pain is a sensation that everyone experiences to varying degrees but its not something that one can define. Here is the thing; unless you have sickle cell you will NEVER truly understand what the pain feels like. Why do I say this? There is a clear distinction between 'regular' pain and sickle pain. Regular pain is a fucking breeze compared to sickle pain, let me give you an example......... Black women addicted to the creamy crack (hair relaxer) I'm sure you can relate. At 18, my pain threshold had gotten so high that whenever I relaxed my hair I couldn't tell when my scalp was burning. Needless to say, the last time I relaxed my hair I was left with scabs that covered over 60% of my scalp. That was the start of my natural hair journey........ yes I shall blog about this too. I realise that this might not be enough of a description for some skeptics out there so I did some research to see if there were any Sicklers who could do a better job, see video below.
So what happens when you have a crisis? There are 4 types of crisis 1.Aplastic crisis 2.Haemolytic crisis 3.Splenic sequestration crisis 4.Vaso-occlusive crisis I won't go into the definitions but I have the great fortune of only experiencing vaso-occlusive crisis. A vaso-occlusive crisis is caused when the sickle-shaped red blood cells obstruct capillaries and restrict blood flow to organs. So my answer is simple........ unadulterated pain. These 'sessions' can vary - from the ickle ones you can manage on your own, to the mutherfuckers that land you in hospital. I still can't decide which one I prefer..... The ickle ones tend to last from days to weeks. You can still function, but the pain is in the background. This can be frustrating, as you don't know whether its going to get better or worse. It also feels like it takes twice as much effort to get everyday stuff done. The mutherfuckers tend to be shorter (if there is no underlying infection), but the aftermath can be a bitch to deal with. Let me explain.......
The body's reaction to pain is to tense up the muscles around the area of pain. The longer your muscles are tensed, the more those muscles work. During a crisis you're too busy with the sickle pain to notice. When its done, your body can feel like you've been hit by a bus....... been backed up on and hit all over again for good measure.
The side effects of the pain medication are also something to consider. They can make you
Drowsy - this side effect I love because it forces you to take the time out. You have no choice. The body in its drugged state shuts down to heal.
Constipated - same way the drugs slow you down, its slows down your digestive system. The longer you're on those meds, the longer it takes for your digestive system to bounce back. In some cases I've had to explore the laxative route to unblock the 'blockage'. Picture that scene in Trainspotting where post heroin high, Renton (Ewan McGregor) uses a laxative suppository to sort out his constipation........ No more words need to be said on that score.
The final thing I will say is that there is absolutely no dignity in pain. There is no posing......AT ALL (insert bush Naija accent here). Take a woman who is in labour or a man who has been kicked in the nuts. The last thing on your mind when you're in that much pain is how good you look, how badly behaved you are, other people's feelings, or how cute the doctor who's shooting you up with Morphine is. You let go completely, this tumblr post sums it up beautifully.
This has given me a 'I don't give a fuck' attitude on a lot of things, and I think I'm better for it. I don't care what people think of me, or how I look to people. I have been known to turn up at my friends house in my pjs, bedroom slippers equip with hot water bottle - who is named Babe. It has contributed to the uniqueness that is me :) .
Toodles!!
In my search for videos, I came across lil Zechariah's video. Maybe because its too close to home I couldn't bring myself to embed it on this post but I still think it is important to share his experience with you.
There are not a lot of people in this world that I can honestly say I truly admire and respect. T-Boz Watkins is one of those people. Looking at what she has been able to achieve despite the odds is an outstanding achievement. I was trawling the internet for inspiration and I found a couple of videos, this one I broke it down.
I was privileged growing up in Nigeria. I have two parents that are medical so I rarely went into hospital (and I HATE hospitals, but lets leave that for a later post). My bedroom can still be converted to a hospital room at a moments notice. The price you pay for being privileged - you are sheltered from the realities that lie in store for you. Yes I knew I have a chronic illness but I didn't realise how it will affect MY future. As a teenager, I didn't think about how that would affect my career, future partner, if I was going to have kids, quality of life and life expectancy. Reality hit during a biology lesson at secondary school. We were studying the Blood types and genotypes. Obviously the topic of Sickle Cell came up and that was when my sheltered existence came crashing down around me. Knowing my status, my teacher gave me one of those old text books used to educate newly weds on the perils of Sickle Cell. *side-bar, this same teacher made me go to the staff room where she proceeded to pray for my healing - needless to say it was one of the many instances that influence my mistrust of religion* It was a depressing read.
Life expectancy 30 - 40 years (and that was a good thing)
Strokes
Swollen joints
Kidney failure
Loss of eye sight
Necrosis of the hip and other major joints
Leg ulcers
Bone Infections
The list seemed endless. Was this what I had to look forward to? In a lot of ways the answer is yes...... but the one thing I have learnt in this life is this; how you deal with shitty situations defines you as a person.
Enter TLC.
CrazySexyCool was the first album that I really connected to, and then I found out T-Boz was a Sickler and it blew me away!!
In my world I was always told to 'take it easy', 'you aren't the same as everyone else' and then there was T-Boz who was dancing, singing and pursing her own dreams! My world involved me hiding my status (again this is worthy of its own post) and there was this individual who was shouting it from the rooftops!!!
It wasn't a solution to the problem, and trust me I still had a lot of growing up to do (still do), but it gave me the determination to NEVER let my condition get the better of me. Now I won't lie there are times when it does get you down and you do have those 'why me' moments. The key is to brush it off, remember your goals and move the fuck on! Life won't wait for you. T-Boz Watkins showed me that. T-Boz I would like to Thank You from the bottom of my heart for you just being you.
My name DrFoxyCleo and I am a Sickler. Yeah I said it. I have Sickle Cell Anaemia and I am not afraid to own the fact that I am one.
In a lot of ways was born different, a cosmic joke, a rare breed within my flock. Let me give you a little back ground......
There are three types of Sickle Cell;
HbSS (this one I like to call 'The Full-Blown Showdown')
HbSC (I call this the 'Just Kicking it')
And my personal favourite HbSBthal (The Clusterfuck)
Now I'm sure you can figure which category I fit into....... yup I'm HbSBthal. Why would I call it the clusterfuck? Let me explain......
I was born in Nigeria in the 80's to two wonderful parents. My father was completing his NYSC serving as a medical doctor and my mum was a nurse. Both my parents are Nigerian and oh did I mention that I am a twin? Anyways 3 months in, I'm crying all the time for no apparent reason.
My mother was at her wits end. She had taken me to hospitals where I was probed and prodded but to with no answers. My dad at this point had moved to the UK to continue his training, so the logical next step was to continue looking for answers over there.
We discovered that my mum carries the HbBthal trait gene and my dad is your typical HbS. So why was it not caught earlier?
Clusterfuck 1 - No Federal, State, or Local government hospital actually tests for Beta Thalassemia in Nigeria. Now this would have been understandable in the 80's but it is still the case now.
I had the pleasure of trying to prove my Sickle Cell Status to the kind people at NYSC. Their rules stated that I would need a blood test confirming my status from a government hospital. Didn't happen, had to get a note from a Gov Dr stating that my type of SCD was 'Rare' and that a private test sent to South Africa will confirm.
When my parents got married, they took the usual tests. At the time, they couldn't identify what my mother was so they just told her she was HbAA and my dad was HbAS. This curveball lead to lil old me!!!
Clusterfuck 2 - Where is my twin sister in all of this? She is HbAA. My younger sibling is also HbAA........ yes in the name of the Highlander.......there can be only ONE.
So yes people! There are 3 types of Sickle Cell that exist in Nigeria. I may be a minority but dammit I exist!!
I've given you my Sickle Cell background but that is not all I am. I am an eccentric, larger than life, outspoken, confused, strong black woman.
